March 2005

Dear Dale: I am of the mind that relationships develop during the course of us living our lives. The idea that people spend inordinate time and money chasing love makes me worry. I am not sure whether I worry more about other people wasting their time and money or questioning whether I am missing something. Maybe you all know something I don’t. I watch my friends get married. But I like filling up all the drawers in the bedroom dresser with my own stuff. I collect hand-painted ties, for example. I also soak in a hot bathtub and drink a beer before I go to bed every night. Live with somebody? I don’t know, Dale. I guess you could say I have an ambiguous intention to marry.  I feel outside the bell-shaped curve when I read your column under protest. But on some level, some part of me wants to be and have a good husband. –Filling, Soaking and Drinking via e-mail from Menlo Park

Dear FSD: As a matchmaker I believe that clear intentions, not ambiguous ones, are the fuel that drives missions to fulfillment. A matchmaker observes the role that intentions play in successful marriages. And new scientific research affirms that intentions (thoughts and feelings; positive and negative) cause specific outcomes.

Dr. Masaru Emoto of Japan conducts experiments on the effects of intentions on water. Participants focus their intentions on a sample of water in a container. The water is then frozen, and the crystals photographed. Water blessed with loving and thankful intentions makes beautiful crystals, hexagonal, white and diamond-like. Water cursed with hate or ungrateful intentions makes ugly crystals, malformed, yellow and spotted. See hado.net to examine the science behind these controlled experiments.

Dr. Bruce Lipton observes that human cell membranes are “an organic information chip” that reacts differently to different environments. “Protein antennas” extend outward from cells, and receive signals from their environment. Dr. Lipton reveals that genes turn on and off by influences outside the cell. These influences include perceptions and beliefs. He shows that beliefs affect genetic activity. See brucelipton.com to examine the science behind these controlled experiments.

A positive belief in marriage transmutes single lives into married ones. As you consider renewing your missions, you may gain belief in life-partnership by contemplating and writing down the positives it adds—companionship, comfort, stability, excitement, safety, and so on. Establish a clear intention to partner—given your individual needs—and watch your mission fulfill before you. This process measures in years, not months. So “fill, soak and drink” your way along the wondrous journey.

<< Back To Advice Page